Marla Rosenthol (above and right) entered
into her second wedding in 2006.

Second Time
Continued from Page 29
“What I love about these second weddings is the intimacy,” said Rabbi
Leib. “They are quite literally surrounded by their loved ones. There
are fewer people, but they’ve all known each other longer.”
Smaller gatherings are a matter of custom and taste rather than
Jewish ritual, according to Rabbi Yonah Gross of the Orthodox Con-
gregation Beth Hamedrosh in Wynnewood. But second weddings
do not call for the seven days of halachically mandated celebration,
known as the sheva b’racha, that are observed after first-time nuptials,
the rabbi noted. “It may be a shorter period if one person has been
previously married,” Rabbi Gross explained. “I think it recognizes
that it’s more of a subdued moment; it’s not the youthful exuberance
of a wedding the first time around.”
Subdued or exuberant, second weddings often celebrate tri-
umph over the kinds of challenges most 20-somethings never
consider. When Marla Rosenthol married five years after surviving
breast cancer — a diagnosis she received three months into her
relationship with Leonard, a computer scientist — “we had a lot
to celebrate,” said the Huntingdon Valley mother of three, now
53. The couple, who met as divorced parents in 2001, were also
formalizing what Rosenthol calls a “mixed marriage,”
a thoughtfully negotiated lifestyle that combined
her Reform values and his Orthodox practice.

Their 2006 wedding, at which both Rabbi Leib
Rabbi Menachem Schmidt of Lubavitch of
Philadelphia participated in the ceremony, in-
30 MARCH 31, 2016
cluded an English-language ketubah reading, separate-sex dancing
and a host of traditional Jewish rituals for which Rosenthol has new-
found appreciation. “We were celebrating what we got from each oth-
er,” she explained. “He got a more balanced life from me, and I got
more Yiddishkeit, more deeper meaning about our religion from him.”
When Robin Gabel marries Dr. Gary Gilman this spring, it’ll be
enough to finally get each other. The Gulph Mills couple in their
50s, who met on JDate nine years ago, endured lengthy, complicated
divorces — both Jewish and civil — and now want to wed as quickly
as possible. So Rabbi Eric Yanoff will officiate for about 15 guests
at Congregation Adath Israel in Merion Station; a larger crowd will
gather for a reception in November.

“There’s a lot of joy in this, because we’ve waited so long,” said
Gabel, who works in biotech sales. “And we went through an awful
lot to get here.” No pun intended: A Jewish divorce, called a get,
is required for remarriage in the Conservative and Orthodox
movements and can be particularly fraught for a woman, who,
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