Something Borrowed —
RACHEL KURLAND | JE STAFF
I MAGINE A REAL-LIFE Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
scenario — except you don’t know who will wear your
pants next, or where.

Enter the world of gemachs.

Within Orthodox communities, gemachs are a go-to
mode of shopping for just about everything: books, nurs-
ing supplies, furniture, party decor and entertainment,
and clothes for all occasions.

Specifi cally, one might say the most important occasion of
all: your wedding day.

Gemach is an abbreviation of gemilut chasadim, meaning
“acts of kindness.” Of course, it’s a mitzvah to give without re-
ceiving anything in return, so many within these communities
set up shop for gemach bridal dresses (as well as bridesmaid
dresses and accessories like headpieces, veils, tiaras or shoes).

Some are free, others are rented. But the small amount spent
on a gemach gown — compared to high-end wedding dress
prices — usually goes toward charity or the cost of running the
gemach storefront itself.

Th ose running these unoffi cial stores — which are common
mostly in New York, New Jersey and Israel — are unpaid.

Of 13,000 brides and grooms surveyed in the U.S. for Th e
Knot’s 2016 Real Weddings Study, the national average cost of
a wedding is $35,329 (pre-honeymoon). Th e average cost of the
dress is $1,564.

Of course, outliers like big Manhattan spenders can’t really
be compared to a DIY wedding in someone’s rural backyard, but
these digits can easily break the bank.

(Aft er all, we can’t all be brides at Say Yes to the Dress’ Klein-
feld, though we can dream.)
With the cost of the dress itself, accessories, alterations and
the time it takes to put it all together without the fl ick of Fairy
Godmother’s magic wand, it’s easy to go over budget on the sin-
gle look — and then you have to plan the rest of the wedding.

Mrs. Tuchinsky, who preferred not to use her fi rst name, had
a tight wedding budget — let alone for a wedding dress — and
a trip to David’s Bridal put her promptly on the
gemach path.

She searched Allure Bridals, too, and
asked a David’s Bridal seamstress how
much it would cost to build upon an
existing dress to make it modest.

While that method can provide
many fashionable options, it was
out of her budget.

While some dresses from
secular companies may come
with sheer long sleeves
or higher necklines, that
doesn’t mean it’s exactly
what the bride wants.

“Once I realized that
was many times the
Mrs. Tuchinsky
PHOTOS PROVIDED
12 OCTOBER 26, 2017
Shayna Edney
amount I could spend, I immediately started contacting ge-
machs,” added Tuchinsky, who got married last March in Lake-
wood, N.J.

She really didn’t see the point in buying an extraordinarily
expensive gown that would hide in her closet never to be seen
or worn again.

“Obviously, if you own it you can rent it or lend it to other brides,
but I couldn’t aff ord to purchase a gown to begin with,” she noted.

Aft er a few peeks in several gemach stores, she ended up at
Zichron Yehudis Miriam Bridal Gemach in Brooklyn.

“It’s an amazing gemach with dedicated volunteers who truly
only care about you fi nding a gown you love,” she explained.

“Th ey spend as much time with you as you need. For $250, you
can rent a dress, a petticoat, shoes, a veil and a headpiece.”
She opted for all of the above, minus the shoes.

“Th ey really do a huge chesed.”
And aft er trying on about 10 gowns, she found the one.

“Th ey let me add a rhinestone belt that I really loved,” she re-
called, “and I also loved that the lace from the bodice extended
past the waistline onto the tulle of the skirt.”
Every once in awhile, she thinks back on her dress from her
big day.

“I’m glad other brides can wear the dress I wore and enjoy
it as much as I did,” she said. “I hope I’ll see my dress again,
SIMCHAS JEWISHEXPONENT.COM




Literally
because it really would make me happy to know someone else was
wearing it. I just hope she has an amazing wedding day!”
Most Orthodox engagements are short, too, meaning Shayna
Edney only had less than three months to find her wedding dress.

“Especially when your engagement period is only a few months,
there is not a lot of time to save for a wedding,” she noted.

While some seamstresses thrive within this time frame, it
doesn’t necessarily outweigh the cost.

After another failed attempt at David’s Bridal, and nothing
stood out at other gemach stores, Edney found her gown at a ge-
mach in Passaic, N.J., just 20 days before the August 2016 ceremo-
ny in Baltimore.

The gemach she visited was run out of a woman’s converted
basement; hundreds of white tulle variations lined each wall and
closet, organized by size.

Edney had the room to herself as the only client that day, so she
took her time — several hours, in fact — to find a match.

She chose a poofy tulle ballroom gown, bedazzled with mod-
est jewels on the bodice, which she rented for $250 ($200 went to
charity, the other for cleaning and repairs).

Fortunately, the dress was a perfect fit in style and size; no alter-
ations required. Post-nuptials, the dress was mailed back.

“A person getting a [modest] dress from a gemach is not so dif-
ferent than a person getting a regular dress from a store,” Edney
“ACTS OF KINDNESS AND GIVING ARE
NOT JUST FOR THE ORTHODOX — IT
IS A MITZVAH AND A QUALITY THAT
BINDS THE ENTIRE JEWISH NATION.”
explained. “The only difference is that the gemach dresses have
been worn before — but you would never be able to tell.”
The ones rented are in pristine condition, and consistent re-
pairs or alterations keep them looking fresh.

“When a person buys a dress from a regular store, it’s not like
you’re getting a one-of-a-kind — there’s hundreds of dresses out
there just like the one you bought,” she added.

Edney emphasized that gemachs aren’t just for Orthodox Jew-
ish weddings, nor should they be.

“Acts of kindness and giving are not just for the Orthodox — it
is a mitzvah and a quality that binds the entire Jewish nation,” she
said. “Dress gemachs should be for everyone of every religion and
every social status. There is no reason for every single bride to
spend $1,000-plus on a wedding dress when they can borrow from
a gemach, and then alter it as they please.

“I wish that more people would donate their wedding dresses
to gemachs,” she continued, “instead of leaving them in a box for
30 years until maybe their future daughter gets married and maybe
will wear their dress.” l
rkurland@jewishexponent.com; 215-832-0737
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