d’var torah
Character Memory — Lessons
From My Car and Eyeglasses
BY RABBI CHAIM GALFAND
G Parshat Nitzavim
rowing up, my mother would tell
me to “stand up straight!” Doing
so required concentration and repetition
and took some getting used to.

In time, though, I’d engrained the
specifi c motor tasks of good posture. We
call this “muscle memory” and use it to
describe our ability to throw a ball, swim
or repeat other common physical tasks,
even if we haven’t done the activity in a
long time. It’s as if our bodies automati-
cally remember what to do in the heat of
the moment. (Th ink of “Th e Karate Kid”
car waxing and fence painting.)
Th is notion of a practiced-movement
turned refl exive-action is on my mind pre-
cisely because Rosh Hashanah is next week.

I coined the term “character memory”
as a corollary to muscle memory and
believe the former is just as achievable
and essential as the latter. Comparing
physical training and character educa-
tion is something I’ve been thinking
about over the last few years. I believe
we should practice exercising vari-
ous character strengths until we auto-
matically deploy them when needed.

Parshat Nitzavim, read right before Rosh
Hashanah, confi rms my belief.

Nachmanides saw Nitzavim as the ori-
gin for the concept of teshuva (repen-
tance). We read, “For the commandment
that I command you this day: It is not
too extraordinary for you, it is not too far
away! It is not in the heavens ...” Which
command? Th at of teshuva, Nachmanides
says, because the passage preceding this
sentence comprises many variations of
the Hebrew root for teshuva: v’hashev-
ota, v’shavta, v’shav, tashuv, yashuv. Th e
repetitions signal emphasis. And I believe
that having a higher quotient of character
memory will mean fewer moments for
which we need to repent.

Teshuva literally means return, as in
turning back to something from which
you’ve strayed. It raises the question:
return to what? Th ere have been diff erent
answers: Israel, moral awareness, God,
the Jewish people. Th e biblical notion
of returning to God gave way to the
rabbinic era’s vision of teshuva as a path
to moral growth through the process of
self-education. Teshuva is a response — an acknowl-
edgment that we veered from where we
knew we were supposed to be. Concrete
analogies to daily life help me better
understand more abstract concepts, and
I keep coming back to two of them.

Th e fi rst is to the magic materials behind
“indestructible” eyeglasses that return to
their proper shape even if bent. Th ese
materials aren’t magic, of course, but are
appropriately called shape memory alloys;
they’re conditioned to remember a correct
form and to resist the forces that try to
push them in the wrong direction. With
education and practice, we can cultivate
character that immediately pushes back
against the forces that would twist us and
remembers precisely where it needs to be.

Th e second analogy is the feature on
many newer cars alerting you when you’ve
begun to drift . It prompts you to return to
your lane; it doesn’t make the change for
you but points you in the right direction.

We can develop character memory that
similarly nudges us to stay within the
boundaries of commendable behavior and
does so with similar insistence and con-
stancy. Th is fi ts nicely with seeing teshuva
as “returning” (to the path).

One’s character rarely exists in a vac-
uum; rather, it comes into focus in relation
to other people — especially the eff ect they
have on us. Nitzavim recognizes spheres of
infl uence. Referring to Canaan’s idols and
their worshippers, the Torah says beware,
“lest there be among you a root bear-
ing-fruit of wormwood and poison-herb.”
Like plants, our location and sur-
roundings aff ect us. Nitzavim continues
by warning that outsiders will observe
our conduct and “see the blows [dealt]
this land and its sicknesses ... by brim-
stone and salt, is all its land burnt, it can-
not be sown, it cannot sprout.” Chizkuni,
emphasizing the pitfalls of the company
we keep, would have us look out for the
misdeeds of others, because their infl u-
ence can be devastating for the collective.

Rather than reading that the individual
“poisons” society, the Sefat Emet looks
at the positive eff ects of community in
serving as a bulwark against the actions
of wayward individuals.

I won’t pretend that there’s an indis-
putable, objective list of what comprises
character, but there is consensus. A
team of 55 social scientists studied world
religions, philosophies and psychology
looking for agreed-upon virtues and
character strengths found across cultures
and time. Th eir research forms the basis
for the VIA Institute on Character.

Similarly, in Judaism we believe that
each of us is endowed with a full range of
“middot” or character traits. Both agree
that what distinguishes one person from
another is not that you have one trait and
I have another, but rather the degree or
measure of the traits that exist in each of
us. Most importantly, both recognize the
uniqueness of each person and also their
capacity to change.

Rabbi Kalonymus Kalman Shapira
fi nds a kind of creativity in our process
of returning to who we are meant to be;
he believes growth and possibility must
be uncovered much as a sculpture is hid-
den by a brute block of stone and must
be drawn out.

My colleagues at Perelman Jewish Day
School understand how each of us is
aff ected by being in a good place with
good teachings and with good people.

We guide our young learners to a mind-
ful awareness of their particular char-
acter strengths, helping them nourish
and develop their virtues and traits as
they aspire to character memory. Th e
elementary years may be the optimal
time to begin, but it’s never too late for
any of us. JE
Rabbi Chaim Galfand is the rabbi for
Perelman Jewish Day School. Th e Board
of Rabbis of Greater Philadelphia is
proud to provide diverse perspectives
on Torah commentary for the Jewish
Exponent. Th e opinions expressed in
this column are the author’s own and
do not refl ect the
view of the Board
of Rabbis.

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