O PINION
Stone Continued from Page 14
online spaces for campers and
counselors, maintaining their
magic. We surged.

Did we reset? Many of us
did not. Th e impact of this
lack of recovery is something
we call surge fatigue — a
decreasing ability to act swift ly
and decisively. Teachers tell me
of administration requests that
would have been easy a year
ago that are simply impossible
now. Call another parent? I
CANNOT. Learn another
program? BEYOND ME.

Attend another meeting? ARE
YOU KIDDING?
Coupled with surge fatigue
is pressure to be cheerful
and optimistic. Look, I know
there are places and times
for optimism. But teachers
and clergy are talking about
toxic positivity — the endless
cheeriness and happy support
which leaves no room for my
exhaustion, my sense of being
overwhelmed, my grief. A
group of teachers I met with
recently talked about how their
administration keeps saying,
“You’ve got this,” making it
nearly impossible to say, “No,
I don’t.”
Th ere should be no shame in
our exhaustion, our grief. We
need to know that we cannot
do as much in month 8 as we
could in month 1. We need to
set the bar lower and accept
that we cannot do what we did
pre-COVID. We need to be
allowed — and allow ourselves
— to do less, to feel like it’s
harder. We need to support
each other when we’re down,
not demand happy faces.

Zoom fatigue, surge fatigue,
decision fatigue, election
fatigue, COVID fatigue, racial
injustice fatigue, loneliness
fatigue, family fatigue. Give
yourself — and those around
you — a break. Do less and
be satisfi ed with what you
can achieve. Say no. Don’t ask
so much — of you or anyone
else. It’s OK to be imperfect.

It’s always been OK to be
imperfect. Th is reset could take a
while, but we need it to be able
to move forward. ●
Betsy S. Stone, Ph.D., is a retired
psychologist who currently teaches
as an adjunct lecturer at HUC-
JIR. Her classes include Human
Development for Educators, The
Spiritual Life-Cycle, Adolescent
Development and Teens In and
Out of Crisis. This piece originally
appeared at eJewishPhilanthrophy.

com. Be heard.

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