d’var torah
Longing for Home
BY RABBI JASON BONDER
Parshat Chayei Sarah
A t the very beginning of this
week’s portion, Sarah dies.

In search of a burial place for
her, Abraham spoke with the Hittites,
among them Ephron the Hittite, who
owned the Cave of Machpelah.

When Abraham spoke with the
Hittites, he did not begin by telling them
that he was brokenhearted. Nor did
Abraham tell them about his wife and
the life that she lived. Rather, Abraham
opened by telling the Hittites that he
was not one of them. Abraham made it
clear that he was diff erent — and from a
diff erent place. He said, “I am a resident
alien among you.” (Genesis 23:5)
Just a bit later in this portion, it came
time for Abraham to fi nd his son, Isaac,
a wife. At fi rst, Abraham did not seem
immediately concerned about fi nding
Isaac the perfect match. Nor did he
seem terribly concerned about many
of the other typical characteristics in
fi nding a wife for his son. Rather, in
Abraham’s mind, the key priority over
all the rest was the hometown of Isaac’s
future bride.

Abraham made his servant swear that
he would not fi nd a Canaanite woman
for Isaac. Rather, he would go back to
the land of Abraham’s birth to fi nd
Isaac a wife. Abraham said, “And I will
make you swear by God, the God of
heaven and the God of the earth, that
you will not take a wife for my son from
the daughters of the Canaanites among
whom I dwell but will go to the land
of my birth and get a wife for Isaac.”
(Genesis 24:3-4)
Abraham’s announcement of his “res-
ident alien” status and his insistence
on fi nding Isaac’s wife from “the old
country” remind me that everything
in life comes with a price tag. Abraham
was given the opportunity of a lifetime.

He was blessed to hear God’s call to “go
forth.” He was blessed to be the father of
a multitude of nations. He was blessed
that his family followed him on his
journey. He was literally blessed by God.

And yet, we see in this week’s portion
that heeding God’s call took a toll on
Abraham. It seems that Abraham was
dreams. Chasing a goal oft en means
following a path with no clear desti-
nation in sight. But they do it because
they feel called to do the work just as
Abraham was called to journey toward
the Promised Land.

Toward the end of this portion,
Abraham’s death is described in the
following way, “And Abraham breathed
his last, dying at a good ripe age, old and
contented, and he was gathered to his
kin.” Had Abraham stayed in his home-
town of Haran, he may have grown old,
but I don’t think that he would have
been contented.

I believe it was his fulfi llment of God’s
call that enabled him to feel contented
upon his death. Had Abraham stayed in
Haran, he would have spent his entire
Chasing a goal often means
following a path with no clear
destination in sight.

homesick all of his life. In his advanced
years, no matter what the folks around
him said, Abraham did not feel at home.

Th e Hittites said to Abraham, “Hear us
my lord.”
“You are the elect of God among us ...”
(Genesis 23:5) But Abraham didn’t agree.

He insisted on paying for the Cave of
Machpelah. Furthermore, it seems like
there were plenty of Canaanite women
who would have gladly married Isaac.

Otherwise, why would Abraham have
had to emphatically direct his servant
to avoid bringing home a Canaanite
woman for Isaac? But he did it because
the Canaanites were not the right fi t for
Isaac, in Abraham’s eyes.

Abraham nobly followed God toward
a place that God would show him. But
getting to that land, and staying there,
meant feeling like an outsider for the
rest of his life. Th is is the price that
many leaders pay in pursuit of their
24 NOVEMBER 17, 2022 | JEWISHEXPONENT.COM
life with his kin, but he would not have
fulfi lled his destiny. By always holding
onto his role as an outsider, perhaps
Abraham allowed himself to feel con-
nected to his ancestors even though he
was physically separated from them.

Perhaps Abraham not only founded
Judaism by the sound of God’s voice
calling him, but also by the urge to make
those from his hometown proud. JE
Rabbi Jason Bonder is the associate
rabbi of Congregation Beth Or in Maple
Glen. Th e Board of Rabbis of Greater
Philadelphia is proud to provide diverse
perspectives on Torah commentary
for the Jewish Exponent. Th e opin-
ions expressed in this column are the
author’s own and do not refl ect the view
of the Board of Rabbis.




calendar
N OV E M B E R 17–N OV E M B E R 23
Have you heard about the Old
York Road Temple-Beth Am 15th
annual “Second Time Around”
vintage and more sale? From
the joy of the hunt to the lure
of the bargain, you’ll find it all
right here from 6:30 a.m.-9 p.m.

and 8:30 a.m.-3 p.m. on Nov. 20.

For more information, contact
Gail Arnopol at 215-663-0299
or Evelyn Fair at 215-680-1315.

971 Old York Road, Abington.

S A T U R D A Y, N O V. 19
GALLERY OPENING
The Penn Museum will reveal its new Eastern Mediterranean
Gallery: Crossroads of Cultures, exploring the world’s first
alphabet to the origins of Judaism, Islam and Christianity, with
a public opening weekend celebration, Nov. 19-20 from
10 a.m. - 4 p.m. 3260 South St., Philadelphia.

F R I D A Y, N O V. 1 8
PARSHA FOR LIFE
Join Rabbi Alexander
Coleman, Jewish educator and
psychotherapist at the Institute
for Jewish Ethics, at 9 a.m. for a
weekly journey through the Torah
portion with eternal lessons on
personal growth and spirituality.

Go to ijethics.org/weekly-torah-
portion.html to receive the Zoom
link and password.

ACOUSTIC MUSICAL SHABBAT
Join Beth Sholom Congregation’s
Rabbi David Glanzberg-Krainin,
Cantor Jacob Agar and the band
at 6 p.m. for a musical Kabbalat
Shabbat service featuring
acoustic music. The community
is welcome to attend. Call
215-887-1342 for information.

8231 Old York Road, Elkins Park.

SISTERHOOD SHABBAT
Congregations of Shaare
Shamayim’s Sisterhood Shabbat
is scheduled for 7:45 p.m. sharp.

The Sisterhood will conduct the
service assisted by Rabbi Sandy
Berliner and Cantor Bernard
Walters. An oneg will follow
services. Please contact
215-677-1600 for further
information. 9768 Verree Road,
Philadelphia. JEWISH FILM FESTIVAL
The Philadelphia Jewish
Film Festival, presented by
Philadelphia Jewish Film and
Media, presents the best in
Jewish international cinema,
running until Nov. 19 and
including seven international
feature films, one shorts program,
an in-depth discussion of
Hollywood’s Jewish New Wave
of the ’60s and ’70s, and an
exclusive brunch screening of
“Funny Girl.” More information
and tickets available at
phillyjfm.org. S A T U R D A Y, N O V. 19
VINTAGE SALE
A CAPPELLA CONCERT
Pizmon, an a cappella singing
group of students from the
Jewish Theological Seminary,
Columbia and Barnard, will
perform at Congregation Beth
El-Ner Tamid in Broomall at
7 p.m. Reservations are required.

Adults $18; Children $5.

Contact the CBENT office at
610-356-8700 or email
office@cbent.org for more
information. NEFESH MOUNTAIN CONCERT
Enjoy a musical evening with
Nefesh Mountain, where
bluegrass meets Jewish heritage
and tradition, at 8 p.m. at Zlock
Performing Arts Center, Bucks
County Community College in
Newtown. For questions, contact
buckscounty@jewishphilly.org. 275 Swamp Road, Newtown.

S U N D A Y, N O V. 2 0
CHANUKAH BAZAAR
Come to Tiferet Bet Israel for
a fun day featuring dozens
of local artisans and vendors
for all your holiday shopping
needs. Sellers will offer unique
clothing, Judaica, jewelry,
home goods, children’s items,
handmade gifts and accessories
from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Contact
tbihanukkahbazaar@gmail. com or 484-744-1995 for more
information. 1920 Skippack Pike,
Blue Bell.

M O N D A Y, N O V. 21
MAHJONG GAME
Melrose B’nai Israel Emanu-El
Sisterhood invites the community
to join our weekly mahjong
game at 7 p.m. Cost is $36
per year or free with MBIEE
Sisterhood membership.

For more information, call
215-635-1505 or email
office@mbiee.org. 8339
Old York Road, Elkins Park.

T U E S D A Y, N O V. 2 2
BINGO WITH BARRY
Join Barry at Tabas KleinLife
for an afternoon of bingo at
12:45 p.m. on Nov. 22 and 23.

Free parking and free to play,
with snacks available on Nov.

23. For more information, call
215-745-3127. 2101 Strahle St.,
Philadelphia. W E D N E S D A Y, N O V. 2 3
INTRODUCTION TO JUDAISM
Introduction to Judaism at
Congregation Kol Ami is a
multisession course for anyone
who wants to gain a deeper
understanding of Jewish life,
continuing from Nov. 2. No
charge for congregants. $180
per device for non-congregants.

For more information, contact
Ruth Scott, director of community
engagement: ruth@kolaminj.org.

1101 Springdale Road,
Cherry Hill, NJ.

T H U R S D A Y, N O V. 2 4
CANASTA GAME
Ohev Shalom of Bucks County
Sisterhood invites the community
to a weekly canasta game from
1-3 p.m. Open play is $4.

Call 215-968-6755 for more
information. 944 Second Street
Pike, Richboro.

YIDDISH SHMOOZE GROUP
If you’ve got the chutzpah, join
Congregation Kol Ami for casual
conversations and programs
in Yiddish. Yiddish Shmooze
Group will meet on Zoom from
10:30-11:45 a.m. on the second
and fourth Thursdays of the
month, through June. For more
information, contact
856-489-0029. JE
JEWISHEXPONENT.COM 25