Alexa Shurman (left) reads during her
bat mitzvah.

Courtesy of Julie Shurman
From Building an Ark to Vacc ine Awareness :
B’nai Mitzvah Plans Get Creative
SOPHIE PANZER | JE STAFF
A lexa Shurman realized in March 2020 that
her bat mitzvah was not going to be the way
she imagined.

Th e Main Line Reform Temple congregant had
her date set for May 2, 2020, but the pandemic threw
her family’s plans into question. Would anyone still
attend? Would the rabbi be able to help? How could
the ceremony take place outside the synagogue?
Aft er much discussion with vendors, family and
clergy, Alexa held her ceremony under a balloon arch
on her porch with a handful of close family members
spread out on the lawn. Th e rabbi assisted her while
adhering to mask and distance precautions, and the
cantor sang on Zoom.

Although Alexa was disappointed that she
wouldn’t get to have a big celebration, she felt better
4 MARCH 25, 2021
when she realized all her peers were having the same
experience. She also felt happy to have one of the fi rst
pandemic bat mitzvahs among her friends so that she
got the uncertainty over with.

Alexa is one of many Jewish teenagers whose
b’nai mitzvah plans were radically altered by the
pandemic. Even in the midst of uncertainty, they
are fi nding ways to make months of studying and
preparation pay off with small ceremonies, virtual
interactions with friends and meaningful mitzvah
projects. By fall, people were more used to the idea of
having smaller celebrations with family and friends
Zoomed in.

Elliott Bronner and his family knew he wanted to
stick to his original date of Nov. 28, 2020, even if the
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celebration looked diff erent.

“From the very beginning we felt very strongly
that you turn 13, when you turn 13. So that’s when
your bar mitzvah is,” mother Jill Bronner said.

Th e Bronners had the ceremony at their house
with Elliott’s paternal grandparents and aunt and
uncle present aft er everyone tested negative for
COVID-19. Th e rest of his family attended virtually.

Elliott built an ark in his dining room by
removing the shelves from a cabinet and using a
quilt for a curtain. Th e Torah was borrowed from
his synagogue, Beth David Reform Congregation in
Gladwyne, and the rabbi and cantor off ered assis-
tance via Zoom.

Elliott was excited to see his close family aft er
months in isolation and enjoyed his ceremony.

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Max Livingston at Beth David Reform Congregation
Courtesy of Deborah Livingston
Yosef Vessal at Congregation Mikveh Israel
Photo by Jay Gorodetzer Photography
Attending virtual b’nai mitzvahs for his friends,
however, just didn’t feel the same.

“I feel like they’re not as engaging, because
you don’t celebrate as much,” he said. “People
do still send cards or gift s in the mail or drop
things off for each other.”
Max Livingston, who also attends Beth
David Reform, was so excited for his Feb. 6 bar
mitzvah that he awoke at 4:30 a.m. to put on
his suit.

His family opted to hold the bar mitzvah in
the synagogue itself. When it was time to head
over, he saw that his mother had arranged a
surprise limousine. Th at, he said, felt special.

“It’s only once in a blue moon you walk
outside your house and your mom’s like, ‘Limo
time!’” he said.

His two sets of grandparents, aunts and
uncles were spread out in the sanctuary, with
the rabbi and cantor attending on Zoom.

“At fi rst, my husband and I were very disap-
pointed about the clergy not being with us, but
ultimately, it ended up really allowing our son
to shine and really take over so many respon-
sibilities,” Deborah Livingston said. “Our son
blew us away with his ability to really run his
service.” Although Yosef Vessal attended many of his
friends’ Zoom ceremonies, he was not able to
host his own. He attends Congregation Mikveh
Israel, an Orthodox synagogue that does not
use Zoom on Shabbat.

Instead, he opted to have 20 family members
sit six feet apart with party favor masks
throughout the large sanctuary on Oct. 29.

“We also had rules. So not as many people
were standing up on the bimah at the same
time, only the rabbi, the person reading and the
person getting the aliyah,” Yosef said.

He’s the eldest of his generation in the family,
and he and his parents always imagined having
a huge party in honor of his bar mitzvah.

“We were planning, like, this giant thing,
JEWISHEXPONENT.COM Elliott Bronner in front of his homemade ark
Courtesy of Jill Bronner
but I’m so grateful that I got to at least have
something in person,” he said.

For one teen whose celebration is coming
up on May 22, the pandemic has provided the
inspiration for a mitzvah project.

Jackson Calder of Huntingdon Valley started
igotvax with his cousin to support two causes
that have become urgent over the past year:
vaccine awareness and food insecurity.

“I was struggling for a little bit on fi nding
a project, because right now you’re limited in
terms of what you can do,” Jackson said. “So I
tried to come up with something that we could
do virtually, and still help out people just as
much as we would in person.”
Jackson knew he wanted to do whatever he
could to support the vaccine rollout. He has an
immunocompromised grandmother he wants
to hug in person again, and he said he knows
many people who have contracted the virus
and died.

He is selling wristbands that read #igotvax to
those who have received doses of a COVID-19
vaccine and asking them to post about their
experiences on social media to encourage others
to get the shot. Th e bands cost $5, and proceeds
are donated to World Central Kitchen, which
provides meals to people facing food insecurity
due to the pandemic.

For the ceremony itself, Jackson is working
with a traveling rabbi to study his Torah
portion. He hopes to have a small gathering
of friends and close family members in his
backyard. Plans will depend on the progress of
the pandemic and the vaccine rollout.

“We’re doing whatever we can to really make
it as fun as possible,” he said. ❤
Wristband from Jackson Calder’s mitzvah project
Courtesy of Stephen Calder
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