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wonderful weddings
Big Jewish Weddings are Back,
with a Personal Touch
M Sasha Rogelberg | Staff Writer
ore than just brides and grooms are saying
“I do” this wedding season. Vered Asta,
principal event planner at Vela Events
serving the Virginia, D.C. and Maryland areas, has
noticed guests saying “Yes” to attending more
weddings, too.

“People have been using weddings as an opportu-
nity for reunions of sorts,” she said. “People haven’t
seen each other in a few years.”
Rather than intimate ceremonies with laid-back
dress and modest receptions, weddings are big, bold
and tailored to the whims of the couple. Asta shared
her wedding trend observations ahead of a busy
summer season.

Bucking Tradition
Working with a diverse Jewish clientele, Asta
has seen new takes on the wedding traditions of
old: Rather than just the groom circling the bride
seven times, the couple circle each other. Similarly,
once-gendered language in a couple’s ketubah is
altered to be more egalitarian and eliminate clauses
that feel dated or irrelevant.

While she’s familiar with planning interfaith and
LGBTQ weddings, Asta has noticed clients choosing
to spotlight different parts of their respective cultures,
such as Sephardic and other non-Ashkenazi traditions.

In an interfaith wedding between a couple with
respective Indian and Jewish backgrounds, the
couple chose to have an Indian ceremony, but said
brachot over the wine and food in Hebrew. The
tradition of the couple circling one another seven
times is shared in both cultures.

“It’s been really nice — a new and exciting challenge
to talk to our couples about, what is the right fit? And
what are the traditions going forward that will mean
the most to you?” Asta said.

Photos courtesy of Vela Events
Personal Touches
Picking meaningful traditions is part of a greater
trend Asta has seen: Couples want to incorporate
parts of their story into their reception.

One couple served milkshakes at the end of the
evening, an homage to their first date. Asta said some
clients choose to incorporate favorite or memorable
restaurants into the evening through a giftcard giveaway.

Another bride and groom, instead of a guest book,
had guests enter a phone booth and leave a voice
message to wish the couple well. Shared personalized
Couples today are interested in big weddings with customized components.

sentiments go both ways. One pair of clients wrote
personalized notes on each guest’s name placard.

Personalized ceremonies and receptions are in part a
result of parents, once insistent on having a hand in their
children’s wedding, taking the backseat in the planning
process. Gone are the days of someone’s father inviting
his business partner to his child’s wedding.

“Couples are speaking up for themselves, but also
the parents are being more open to recognizing that
it means more if these are people that they know, and
it’s a more meaningful celebration if it’s people they
know,” Asta said. “So it’s really more of a collaborative
planning process.”
Sustainable Solutions
Clients not only want to be creative, but eco-friendly
as well. Vela Events, as well as other event planning
companies around the country, have found ways to
accommodate that desire.

“Couples are certainly more conscious of what is
happening after the event,” Asta said.

If clients want to have compostable plates and
silverware made of bamboo or other organic materials,
Vela Events will compost them, along with food
scraps from uneaten plates. Extra food and unused
ingredients will go to shelters or local food pantries.

Vela Events donates flowers and floral arrangements
to women’s shelters as well.

Staying in the Budget
After years of COVID-impacted weddings, couples
have been pulling out the stops for their celebra-
tions, but Asta is aware that some clients may not or
cannot break the bank for their special day.

To still make the day feel special while saving some
cash, Asta recommends hiring a DJ instead of a live
band, or switching out a multicourse meat meal for
a dairy or vegetarian catering option. Couples will
often opt to provide beer or wine for guests at the
reception, instead of an open bar. Of course, a small
guest list means lower costs, too.

Considering an appropriate venue that accommodates
these budget restrictions can help the wedding keep
its charm and elegance. If you have a beautiful outdoor
venue, you may be able to save money on decor or
dress the event down, if you have little interest in
spending money on a gown or tuxedo.

Making some sacrifices may be necessary to
planning the big day, but Asta recommends having
three core components to prioritize: “Great music,
excellent lighting, really great food. I think people
always remember those.” ■
srogelberg@midatlanticmedia.com JEWISHEXPONENT.COM
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