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Differing Jewish Views on Valentine’s Day
L O CAL
JED WEISBERGER | JE STAFF
FOR MAN Y
JEWS, Valentine’s Day is a day for
cards, chocolate, gifts and
maybe a romantic dinner.

However, in some Jewish
families, Valentine’s Day —
which has roots as a Western,
Christian holiday — is a day
that has been met with conster-
nation and non-recognition.

“It is not a Jewish holiday,’’
Center City resident Rhona
Gerber said. “And my son
was uncomfortable with it in
public school, being raised in
an observant Jewish home,
and that made me feel badly.

Also, we have our own Jewish
romantic holiday, Tu B’Av.”
Tu B’Av, the 15th day in the
month of Av on the Hebrew
calendar, less than a week after
Tisha B’Av, is mentioned in
the Mishna and several other
sources as a “day of love” in the
era of the temples.

On that day, the unmarried
girls in Jerusalem dressed in
white garments and went to dance
in the vineyards hoping to find
husbands. This was also done,
according to the Talmud, each
Yom Kippur, with both Tu B’Av
and Yom Kippur labeled “the two
happiest days of the year.”
Between the destruction
of the Second Temple by the
Romans in the year 70 and the
establishment of the state of
Israel in 1948, Tu B’Av got lost in
the shuffle. The minor holiday
never had any liturgy attached
to it, just love and romance.

With Israel’s establishment,
came a re-establishment of
Tu B’Av which, in turn, has
become a desired day to sched-
ule your wedding. It also offers
a lift after the austere Bein
had-Metzarim, the three weeks
that lead up to Tisha B’Av.

Tu B’Av is Aug. 15-16 in 2019.

“That we look forward to
celebrating,” Gerber said. “It is
the Jewish holiday of love, sim-
ilar to Valentine’s Day.”
Area rabbis offer differing
viewpoints on Valentine’s Day
and Tu B’Av.

Rabbi Lance Susssman of
Reform Congregation Keneseth
Israel leaves the observance
of either — or both — to his
congregants. “Valentine’s Day is good
for cards and flowers, and Tu
B’Av is in the middle of the
summer,” Sussman said. “In
our synagogue, we don’t pay
attention to either. It’s up to the
family or individual.”
Rabbi Albert
Gabbai of
Orthodox Sephardic
Congregation Mikveh Israel in
Center City, had an interesting
take on both holidays.

“Tu B’Av is our holiday and
has a beautiful tradition of girls
all dancing in the same white, so
the character is judged, not the
looks or attire. But if Valentine’s
Day brings out the tradition of
love between a husband and
wife, and gives a chance to
look at our Jewish traditions, I • Does the debated activity
have no issue with it. Love is
have a secular origin or
important.” value?
As far as where Valentine’s • Can one rationally explain
Day sits with some additional
the behavior or ritual apart
rabbinical opinion, it seems to
from the non-Jewish holi-
check out all right with the
day or event?
Rama (Rabbi Moshe Isserles, • If there are idolatrous ori-
Poland, 1520-1572), who
gins, have they disappeared?
explained that there are four • Are the activities actually con-
criteria that must be met in
sistent with Jewish tradition? l
order to permit Jewish cele-
bration of rituals initiated by jweisberger@jewishexponent.com;
non-Jews: 215-832-0737
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Dancing girls on Tu B’Av
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FEBRUARY 14, 2019
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