d’var torah
Wrestling With Judaism
By Rabbi Elyssa Cherney
Parshat Vayishlach
W restling. We, as Jews, wres-
tle with so many things.

With identity, with being a
minority and with when and how to
live out our Jewish values.

Last week, in parshat Vayetzei
(Genesis v. 28:17), we see Jacob in a
state of awe. “Ma Norah ha Makom
Hazeh.” He awakes and says this line.

... Wow, how awesome is this place?!
Th is must be the place of G-d! He is
presumably in just an ordinary place
that he has stumbled upon during his
travels. Th e Hebrew word that is used
for awe, Yi-rah, is also the same word
that is used for fear.

Th is verse of Torah is the same verse
I use in a niggun (a wordless melody)
to open up a beautiful wedding cere-
mony. Why? Because I know that G-d
is surely there. Th at celebrating love is
indeed a place of awe. Yet somehow, it
is also a place of great fear. Fear of the
unknown. Fear of what life will throw
at this marriage. Fear of lack of support
from the community and world that
surrounds the couple.

Sometimes when we are in the
thicket of the weeds, it is hard to see
the miraculous vision of awe that the
Torah speaks about. We may be stuck
in the fi ght, in the wrestling. Yet, when
we get to the other side, I hope we are
struck with wonder and gratitude for
having gone through the journey. As
Torah teaches us, it isn’t just about the
joys but the griefs and challenges as
well. In this week’s parsha, Vayishlach,
Jacob wrestles with an angel and pre-
vails. He then asks to be blessed by
the angel before the angel departs.

Th e angel replies, “Your name shall no
longer be Jacob, but Israel, for you have
striven with beings divine and human
and have prevailed.”
Th rough this wrestling, Jacob over-
comes his fears. Th e question I am left
with is: How do we wrestle with that
which we fear? Is it in fact wrestling
with something that turns it from fear
into awe? Or is awe always there as the
trembling curiosity and we must stop
to engage with it instead of running the
other way?
I think about these two verses from
time to time. I think about this con-
cept of awe/fear and how it relates to
the Jewish community. I think about
how the Jewish community I grew up
with and the one I am a part of now
are shift ing. I think about the ways
in which the Jewish community itself
must wrestle with its own identity and
defi nition of Judaism.

I’m in awe of the way in which Jews
and those who love them are being
more and more embraced in a world
that once feared their very existence. I
marvel at the way that I see non-Jewish
partners being welcomed into Jewish
spaces. Yet, many of these couples still
enter Jewish spaces with that fear. Fear
of rejection and fear of having to defend
their love. I don’t think interfaith fami-
lies have fully come to be accepted for
their similarities over their diff erences
within the Jewish community and are
still, in fact, wrestling.

When Jacob is blessed by the angel
and his name shift s, he no longer lives
in fear. Jacob instead lives with confi -
dence in his new identity, and his new
name Israel. He is able to approach his
relationship with his brother Esau in
a way that works toward peace versus
agitation. I wonder what that type of radical
acceptance would look like in the lib-
eral Jewish world. I can understand
both sides of the word Yi-rah as fear
and as awe. As if fear is, in fact, the
reverence of trembling in disbelief at
the infi nite possibilities before us.

Th ere is always going to be the fear
of change, and the foresight of amaz-
ing miracles as well. Perhaps we can
only experience true awe once we, like
Jacob, have gotten to the other side and
prevailed past fear.

Jews and those who love them have
already prevailed in so many ways.

For those who still wrestle with what it
means to hold a Jewish identity, I hope
you feel more blessings of awe than fear
in the journey ahead. JE
Rabbi Elyssa Cherney is the founder
and CEO of Tacklingtorah. Th e Board of
Rabbis of Greater Philadelphia is proud
to provide diverse perspectives on Torah
commentary for the Jewish Exponent.

Th e opinions expressed in this column
are the author’s own and do not refl ect
the view of the Board of Rabbis.

social announcements
B I RTH
B I RT H DAY
PAIGE JULIET DAUSCH
RUTHE VEDATSKY STEINBERG BROWNSTEIN
L R
u t h e Ve d a t s k y S t e i n b e r g
Brownstein celebrated her 100th
birthday on Nov. 10.

The celebration continued with a
party on Nov. 12, surrounded by her
family and friends who came from
across the United States and the
United Kingdom.

She is the mother of four children
and their spouses, a grandmother of
nine plus spouses and a great-grand-
mother of seven.

Courtesy of the Assour family
indsay and Justin Dausch announce the
birth of their daughter Paige Juliet on
June 23.

Sharing in the joy are grandparents
Susan Breslow Silver, Bob Silver, Janis
Zaidman Silver, Jane and Daniel Dausch
and great-grandparents Melvyn Breslow,
Roberta Steinberg, Barbara Breslow
(deceased), Marvin Silver, Geraldine Silver
(deceased), Judy Penziner (deceased) and
Michael Penziner.

Paige Juliet “Shoshana Yaff a” is named
in loving memory of maternal great-great
grandmother Sylvia Pearl and paternal
great grandmother Judy Penziner.

Courtesy of the Brownstein family
Courtesy of the Dausch family
JEWISHEXPONENT.COM 29